two things

is it still socially acceptable to identify yourself as a 20 something when you're actually much closer to 30 than 20?

 

ehh.

 

i know i am not the only person i know out there who struggles on the daily about what i'm doing with my life. while many of my friends are getting promoted at their jobs, establishing their careers, getting engaged, buying houses,planning weddings, talking about dinnerware, mortages, potty trainings, grown up things.....i'm just over here thinking about my next move.

 

is that such a bad thing? i'd like to think that it's not so much that im behind in life. or hopelessly dreaming. i think my future is still being made, processed and designed, and sooner or later the pieces will all fall into place and i will wake up one morning and find that i am exactly where i'm supposed to be. in the meantime, i'd rather see my path as a never ending possibility. i may be single, but i'm not alone. i may not know what job i'll be doing in 30 years, but i do know i can find a whole bunch that i enjoy along the way. i'm not planning my wedding, but hell i don't even know how to go on a date so why jump the gun?

 

don't get me wrong. for those of you who are established and are actually real grownups as so many of my friends are, i might envy you, but mostly i am happy for you. i know i'll get there too someday.

 

but why are we all in such a rush? i feel like everyone i know is so stressed out from one thing or the other, and no one is ever really enjoying any part of their day. seriously, look at your facebook timeline. take count of how many of your friends are currently posting a status about how tired they are, how pissed off they are, how they need a vacation/newjob/new body/new everything.

 

how many of them are posting just to say hi to the world? how many are posting about the stranger who complimented them, or how theyre wearing their favorite shirt today, or how they spent five minutes sitting in the sunshine? how many of the posts out of your hundreds of friends are happy, content, inspiring, humble? i'm thinking it's a small number.

 

i'm guilty of this too. just an hour ago i posted a status about my neighbors and our garbage flying around in the street because of how windy it is. (it really is though, i hear things flying around out there and hitting the house!)

 

i wish we'd all just take time in our daily lives to appreciate the little things more. to take a moment to ourselves and just look around and realize all we have, instead of taking it all for granted, and waking up one day five years from now with no recollection of the wonderful experiences that have gone by. or maybe not wake up at all. you never know what tomorrow will bring, we all only have today and even that's not guaranteed.

 

..................

 

anyway, this post got a little off course and i apologize because it's 3 am and i woke up from going to bed early and now here i am wide awake again, but that's alright. i shall leave you with these two things i just stumbled upon for all you fellow 20 somethings out there:

 

a quote:

 

Your twenties are your ‘selfish’ years. It’s a decade to immerse yourself in every single thing possible. Be selfish with your time, and all the aspects of you. Tinker, travel, explore, love a lot, love a little, and never touch the ground

 

and a link that i agree with 90% of:

 

21 ways you should take advantage of your twenties

 

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams,

 

xo

a list.

i'm putting this out there, so maybe someone else can help hold me accountable...maybe.

1. i will lose 20 lbs by september. IN A HEALTHY WAY. if i lose more, then that would be great. but i'm definitely at an unhealthy weight right now and that's not okay. i'm young, but i'm not young enough. i need to stop saying i'll try again next week, next month, next year, and start doing something about it right now.

2. i will do some sort of exercise every day instead of sitting on the couch: playing wii tennis, zumba, lifting weights on commercial breaks, walking around my neighborhood, going to the gym i've been paying a membership to...anything. there's a difference between taking time to relax and just being lazy.

3. no more soda: water, water, water with the occasional wine in there. because i can treat myself every now and then

4. no more ridiculous spending. the only purchases that are going on my credit card are gas and groceries. i can't afford it. my parents can't afford it. who do i think i am anyway? a spoiled grown up that still acts like a kid. i'm ridiculous.

5. focus on the good things about myself: is my hair straight? who cares. do i have a boyfriend? it doesn't matter. am i healthy and happy? that's what counts. so i better put effort into working on those instead.

6. i will find a job. and i will enjoy it. even if it's not what i really want to do. because let's be real, i have NO idea what it is i really want to do. and i have three degrees that i paid way too much money to get and are just gathering dust on a wall in my parents house. time to grow up, and learn to provide for myself. my parents are getting older and it's not fair to them.

7. i will continue to do things that i DO love. because everyone needs that in their life. even if i can't make a living off any of my hobbies, atleast i have hobbies to keep me happy, feeling like i'm using my creativity somehow and keeping my mind active, that's what matters.

8. i will try something on my list of things i want to try, even if i may not be good at it, even if i might be terrified. if i don't try now, when will i?

9. i will try to stop being so afraid. i will find some help for my anxiety if it gets out of control and i think i can't handle it on my own.

10. i will cut people out of my life that only see the negative in life. i just can't have that around me anymore, it's exhausting. it's not so much about how many friends i have, and more about what they bring to my life. it takes just as much effort to be happy than it does to be miserable. stop judging everyone around you when you don't even know them. what do you gain by doing that?

11. i will look at everyone i come in contact with, with fresh eyes. no matter what i've heard of them, what they look like, what theyve done before that moment. treat everyone with an open heart & a clear mind. yep, new plan.

12. i will organize my closet. i know, this seems like a simple thing but for me it's huge. i have so much stuff. i buy things to make myself feel better, i buy things to celebrate anything, i keep things because they remind me of that moment when i was wearing it and something wonderful happened, i keep things because they remind me of how i felt at that moment. i need to simplify my closet. do a clean out. start fresh with my life. simplify my life.

i think this started as a summer to do list, but i think it turned into a life list...

oh well, it never hurts to look at your life and point out the areas you'd like to improve upon.

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams

xo

Sarah

it's ok.

linking up with these lovelies { neely & amber }

today for another it's ok thursday

whooop, i'm excited and it's been awhile since i linked up for this party :)

it's ok...

... that i was going to make myself a proper meal for lunch, but then decided on one of my favorite comfort foods from when i was little: a bagel, sliced, with melted mozzarella cheese. yum. made in under a min zapping it in the microwave. win.

...that i don't want to pay to get my hair done so im going to be a little risky and highlight my own hair tonight. wish me luck.

...im a little obsessed with my leopard print nails (thanks sally hansen stick ons) even when my dad and brother both made fun of me when they saw them

...to have never watched american idol ever until now. and i kinda love it.

...to feel like i've been on vacation the last few weeks, since i haven't been working

...that now that i have a start date for my first day of work, i kinda wish i had more time off.

...to sleep late, and stay up late. just because i can.

...to LOVE the crunching machine at the gym. because it makes me feel productive.

...to feel more inspired on the elliptical when i have some sassy music playing on my ipod...like bachata...or 50 cent. yeah.

.... to spray paint everything i can with this shiny copper metallic paint i got because i feel pinterest inspired. my glue gun and i are taking on the craft world.

...to really, really want to be one of those online dating success stories. except it would be much better if 45 year old guys stopped messaging me creepy messages. and...other creepy guys  my age stopped sending me creepy messages.

... to want to message said guys and give them a heads up that they sound like they kidnap people in shady vans on the regular. and the picture of your car doesnt impress me. neither does the pic of you and your abs in the mirror, in your bathroom. don't you have normal pictures? with friends doing things? or friends to take normal pictures of you? i don't understand.

and...that's all folks.

happy thursday!!

p.s. i had no idea it WAS thursday until i saw all the "it's ok" posts on my blogger feed.

ohhh life.

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams

Sarah

through the looking glass

i've made it a habit these last few months (...maybe even years) to avoid looking at myself in the mirror
as often as possible.

yep.

last week, i was actually out, went into the womens bathroom and was confronted { smack } right in my face with my reflection, in a giant mirror right when you walked through the door.

i actually did a double take.
was that really me? do i really look like that? is that how other people see me?


to say i was shocked is an understatement. i literally could not believe that the person looking back at me..was actually me.

it's amazing really..or maybe not so much...but i've let myself go. not that i was ever super healthy, or fit, or even in shape...but these last few months that have turned into years i've physically turned into someone i don't even recognize in the mirror.

i get angry and embarrassed when people post pictures of me on facebook. i spend hours thinking of what outfit i can wear to minimize the excess around my stomach or if wearing a strapless dress is really the best choice. i've turned into the girl who makes jokes about her weight so that others won't. i've been known to make a joke about having a tattoo i haven't seen in years because my stomach gets in the way. i wear yoga pants and leggings because i cannot stand that thought of trying on my clothes that no longer fit. i actually am mortified to know that someone within these last few months has seen my body in all it's glory, and cannot for the life of me imagine what they thought when they looked at me
{really, it can't be anything worse than i've been thinking about myself but still...}

on wednesday, i went to the gym with a friend for the first time in i don't even know how long. after working out, sweating, feeling really good about myself and with new plans to start getting in shape and losing weight, we went home and i decided to step on a scale, to see what my official starting point was.

i actually thought i was going to pass out when i saw the number. ill spare you the details,
but, i have never, ever  weighed this much before in my entire life. EVER.


i cried that night. i have no one else to blame but myself for this. i don't work out. i never sleep or sleep too much. i eat at all hours of the day and night, and not healthy choices either.

my bmi classifies me as morbidly obese.
i am 5 feet 1 inch tall.
i am 26 years old.

my body feels like a costume i put on that doesn't fit right.
i have stretch marks in places they don't belong, and have to think twice about wearing a dress somewhere because i might get the elusive "chub rub". i had to bare my stomach for a good twenty minutes the other day (don't ask, totally for a normal reason) in front of my best friends and spent the entire time being embarrassed and hoping they weren't disgusted by my body. i've even become someone who hates shopping because my favorite stores don't carry sizes that fit me anymore.clearly, this is not ok.

i cannot for the life of me understand how i have let things get so out of control.


but this i DO know:

i attended a funeral this weekend of a college friend who died at the age of 26 who did everything right in his life and still got cancer.

i want to live to a very old age, and be surrounded by family members who love me.

i want to be able to run with my kids on a beach.

i want to have kids.

i want to be able to wear a bikini, and feel beautiful and proud of the curves of my body.

i want to take the stairs and not feel out of breath.

i want to be able to run a mile. because i can't right now. i never actually have. and then after that..run two miles...5 miles...10 miles...a marathon.

i want to stand in front of a guy, lights on, middle of the day, whatever... and think to myself he's damn lucky to be seeing me right now, and he sure as hell better think so too.


forget about the fact that i want to fall in love, that i'm almost desperate to (i can admit that about myself).
forget that i want to figure out what it is i want to do with my life.
forget that i happen to think i am pretty, and smart and funny and so many other great things.

because right now all i want is to be healthy. to lose weight for my own health. to be fit. to not feel like im carrying around all the grief and heartache and confusion and self doubt that's been growing inside my head these last few years and apparently growing around all the rest of me as well, weighing me down and making me avoid catching my own eye in the mirror.

i'm not being unrealistic here. i know im not going to grow five more feet,
or look like alessandra ambrosio

Source: google.com via Joanna on Pinterest

or miranda kerr

Source: tired-of-excuses.tumblr.com via Bailey on Pinterest

but...you know..
maybe..i could feel like this girl instead.

Source: google.com via Sarah on Pinterest

...and if i ended up also looking like miranda kerr...well that'd just be a bonus no?
i do happen to be short and adorable..or so i've been told.


SO...anyway....this wasn't meant to be a total woe is me post.
i actually wanted to ask if any of you have any work out ideas for me, machines at the gym you prefer over others, any success stories to pass on to me, changed to my diet you'd recommend...you know anything helpful advice you'd like to share with me, that would be just super :)

with a heart (soon to be a much healthier one!) full of hope
& a mind full of dreams

Sarah 

heaven.

today i found out an old friend of mine from college died after a long battle with cancer. 

he was my age. 

and he was one of the greatest, kindest, friendliest guys i have ever known. 

im not just saying that because he's passed, it's the actual truth.

i've been crying all day. 

these last few years since college we haven't been in touch except for the random comments and quick catch up messages on facebook, but it never failed that whenever i heard from him, it brought a smile to my face.

he was eternally optimistic about his future, and never gave up hope of a recovery. 

today, as the news of his death reached our college network, and people who knew him back home, near my own hometown, the sadness everyone felt about losing him was evident. 

so tonight i'd like to ask you all to do this...

be thankful for your lives, for your health, and for the possibilities of the future ahead of you. 

do not take one second of it for granted, live your life to the fullest, enjoy every second of it.

 reach out to people you may have lost touch with, let them know youre thinking of them, let the people in your life know you love them and appreciate them. 

...appreciate everything.

everyone who had the privilege of knowing you was the better for it James. 

may you rest peacefully now and watch over us, xo

25 things you probably don't need to know about me but i'll share anyway

I have some new readers here

and i don't like to be rude and not introduce myself....

sooooo to tell you a little about myself

here are some completely random

25 fun facts

about this little miss:

who grew up into this one:

1. i never carry an umbrella. everever. i do own three but i cant stand carrying around a drippy wet umbrella so i just don't. ill wear a hat and tuck my hair up into it, or use my hood, or make a slow walk mad dash to wherever i need to be

Source: issuu.com via Kat on Pinterest

2. i don't like twizzlers. nope. when i do have one it does nothing for me, i think they taste like a cherry flavored plastic/rubber hybrid.

Source: samsclub.com via Trenda on Pinterest

3. i climbed the leaning tower of pisa when i was three. i can still imagine how i felt inside it, and swear i could feel it moving the higher up we got.

Source: flickr.com via Sarah on Pinterest

4. you know those little black round magnets? i stuck one up my nose when i was little and thought i had it in there for weeks. my mom says it was only like ten minutes but whatever. i have no idea why, apparently i wanted to see if i could breathe with one in there.

5. i never used a public bathroom until i went to college. never. imagine what our roadtrips to florida were like with me holding it in until we stopped at our hotel for the night. and yes, i realize that hotel bathrooms count as public, but for some reason they made the cut.

6. i wanted to name my dog optimus prime. true story. i was going to call him opti for short. before i got him i would actually refer to him as opti. and then i went, saw him and named him riley. again, as with many of the choices i make and then look back on, i have no idea why.

Source: joshnizzi.com via Dimitri on Pinterest

7. i don't like lady gaga. { gasp, blasphemy i know! } i will jam out to that dance song or sometimes even pokerface. but that's it. im just not into her. sorry to all you diehards out there.

Source: dailystab.com via Shayna onPinterest

Source: 3.bp.blogspot.com via Jenna on Pinterest

8. i used to be in beauty pageants. think toddlers and tiaras. except my parents weren't nuts and i looked like a four year old not a four year old hooker. i rememer being asked what my favorite food was after i walked down the runway and couldnt think of anything so i said spaghetti. i don't even like spaghetti.

Source: google.com via Abbey on Pinterest

9. on that note, i also was a baby model. apparently my retirement came early when i threw a tantrum one day during a catalog shoot because i didnt want to pose with a random stranger and pretend she was my mommy. to think, i could've been discovered and become the next mary kate & ashey olsen if i wasnt such a brat.

10. i didn't start wearing makeup until I was 23 i had no idea how, and didn't think i really needed any. sure sometimes i wore some when someone else put it on for me but really, i wasn't too into it.

11. my ex boyfriend taught me how to wear eyeliner. my dad likes to say it's one of the few things "the useless" did for me, along with giving me my favorite pair of boots, and forgetting his fancy knife set when he left.

Source: weheartit.com via Shabna on Pinterest

12. i have three scars from when i had the chicken pox. i know where they are and one is totally from my dad thinking i got gum stuck to me and trying to pull it off since it was the very first and lone pock on me before the others showed up. i remember that happening like it was yesterday, true story.

13. i love leopard print. all the time, with anything.

14. i never match, atleast not on purpose. i literally will put on whatever i want to wear and decide it looks lovely together. stripes, flowers, camo print, black, brown, blue, hot pink, and toss on a red hat for good measure? add tons of bangles and an obnoxiously awesome necklace? yep. i like it just fine :) im going for a nicole richie bohemian look with a dash of my own things tossed in

Source: hipgirlie.com via Tara on Pinterest

15. i wish i was taller. but not like something ridiculous like wishing i could grow a foot overnight. i'd like to be like three inches taller. that's all. my 5'1 self just would enjoy a slight extra boost. thank goodness for heels.

16. im a sucker for a guy in plaid. and if he's tall? and has nice hands? but the most guaranteed to make me have the biggest crush on them instantly? if they can make me laugh...which isn't hard to do since i laugh at basically everything as pointed out by many a teacher over the years... make me giggle and im done..
{ le sigh }

Source: google.com via Kristen on Pinterest

Source: gq.com via Nicco on Pinterest

17. i can read a whole book in one day. because i like it. and because that's how i always read. which is why i used to read in the dark when i was little because it was past my bedtime and ultimately ended up needing glasses. thank goodness for lasik surgery.

18. i miss my glasses. yep. oddly enough it turns out i liked them, just not the inconvienence of them...imagine my joy sadness at learning i needed a night prescription six years after my surgery. soo i busted out an old pair for my new little prescription and now happily wear them when needed

Source: iphonetoolbox.com via Katie on Pinterest

19. i hate opening presents infront of people. DESPISE it. i always feel so awkward about it. like what if i hate it? and i dont want to hurt their feelings, but they can tell i hate it?or theyre sooo excited about me opening it and then i dont react as thrilled as they are? or i already know what it is and can't act surprised ( bc i have snooped and found out ahead of time, maybe...once or twice) sigh. i try to distract people when it comes time to open gifts but it almost never works...it's always just so awkward.

Source: pinkchampagneprep.blogspot.com via Terri on Pinterest

20. im terrified of dying. seriously, i don't understand how everyone else isn't completely freaked out by it like i am...or maybe you all are and just have figured out the secret to dealing with it, and if that's the case please feel free to share it with me. like one second youre living, breathing, feeling, thinking, existing... and then suddenly youre just not. and you have no idea. i wish i could know that there's something else after this, that someone could answer all my questions, comfort me in some way about it...ugh, sorry this one was a morbid downer :(

21. i peed in my pants when i was in second grade. in school.
in gym class.
my scary gym teacher said none of us could say one word until after we did our warm up excercises...she was really terrifying and i thought she'd eat me or something. when i did cave in to ask, she yelled at me. three minutes later i was sitting in a puddle of my pee, got up and ran out hysterically crying. my classroom teacher found me running down the hallway and took my to the nurse to change my clothes and then brought me back to the room with her to read any book i wanted instead of making me go back to gym. miraculously, when everyone came back to class not one person knew i had peed in my pants, or they never said anything. to think...i could've lived the rest of my school years being known as Sarah PeePants.

22. i've experienced two hail storms, an earthquake, a cyclone, a tornado and a super freakstorm flooding.

23. ok this one is a repeat from a past post buttttt i think it's worth sharing again.
when i was little i thought serial killers were bad guys who ran around supermarkets cutting open boxes of cereal. i'd be like wow, that's a mean thing to do...what do all these people have against lucky charms boxes?!
yep.
tell me that isn't exactly what comes to mind when you first think of it?

Source: tumblr.com via Kaia on Pinterest

24.  i'm late for everything. always. even with the best intentions of getting there early. it's probably one of the worst things about myself, and the one i feel the guiltiest about on a regular basis. because really everyone always knows i'm going to be late and that's just plain embarassing. so if i've ever had you waiting on me, or if you end up waiting on me, i'm sorry. i read once that fifteen minutes is the cut off for waiting on people, because someone can legitamitely be fifteen minutes late by accident. after that, if you've been waiting 20 minutes it's because the person doesn't respect you. trust me people, i respect you, i'm just super easily distracted.

Source: 2perc.blog.hu via Gabriella on Pinterest

25. i hate cursing, but love lil wayne. is that an oxymoron? maybe. seriously, you should hear me rock out to him. redic. im a spectacle to be seen.

Source: weheartit.com via Lauren on Pinterest

andddd an extra one for good luck...or because i'm 26...or because i don't like odd numbers...

26. i don't like odd numbers. ha.


ok there's so many more random things about myself i could keep going on about but you've probably had enough.

{ BUT }

if for some reason you haven't gotten your fill of my random info

 click

{ here }

for a little bit more :)

have a lovely weekend lovebugs!

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams

Sarah

searching

I'm staring at applications that need to be filled out,

cover letters that need to be tailored,

and websites of jobs I really want.

I am fantastically tired,

think I might fall asleep right now

and have a phone interview to schedule in the morning.

my parents are worried about this new idea of mine.

i don't think my dad believes me

when i say i really want to do this.

my mom thinks i need to have the perfect job before i go.

who knows what my perfect job is?

im all over the place in my passions, my creative outlets, and my career choices....

isn't there a job where i could get paid to...

 bake desserts,

cook amazing entrees,

host dinner parties,

travel,

create greeting cards,

make my own ornaments,

snuggle,

play uno & running bases with kids,

sew up infinity scarves,

color,

take photographs,

hunt for unique jewelry,

collect sunglasses,

read books

and name nail polishes.....?

hm. because that's the job I want

keep me in your thoughts please lovebugs...
I need some positivity to come my way

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams

Sarah

fill up my life with yet to come surprises

I'm choosing happiness over suffering, I know I am.

 I'm making space for the unknown future to fill up my life with

yet-to-come surprises.

― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

a few things:

i would like a call back for a job i want in providence...like today.

so that i can move after christmas.

oh what? you didn't know i decided yesterday that i'm moving back to providence?

why yes, i did in fact decide to move back to providence, applied for a bunch of jobs, and scoped out apartments all day yesterday.

i gave my mom a speech about being stuck in a life i didn't choose for myself, while the person who talked me into it isn't even part of my life anymore. i talked about feeling like there is a whole life out there that isn't going to happen if i don't make it happen. i talked about not feeling like an adult at 26, not being able to support myself if i keep depending on my parents, not moving on with my life if i stay here.  i can't live at home forever. i'm not 16 anymore.

i want to be closer to the people i think of first when i have good news, bad news, news that's not important to anyone else, but they know it's important to me. the people who know all the things i've done these last few years, the things i've gone through, the troubles i've survived. the people who showed up when i needed them the most.

i want to make memories and never forget the people that matter to me the most.

i want to wake up in the morning excited to go to work. i want to be surrounded by people who also feel fulfilled by the work they do. i want to make a difference in the life of atleast one child. i want to get a paycheck and know that I earned it, by doing something i love, and that the money isn't even the biggest reward from it.

i want to go grocery shopping and pay for the things i need with the money i made. i want to invite friends over to my house for dinner, drink wine, enjoy each others company. i want to paint my room and get new furniture and put effort into a space that i plan on staying in for a few years, not a few months.

i want to meet someone.

i want someone to meet me and think: "she is someone that i want to get to know"

love at first sight would be nice, but love over time isn't something i'd pass up either.

i want someone in my life who calls that day, sends a message just to say hi, doesn't care about looking too interested, too needy, too desperate.

someone who wants me to know that they are thinking of me.

someone who cares about how i might be feeling.

someone who wonders what i'm doing.

someone good and kind.

someone who works hard and has dreams and goals.

someone who is tall.

someone who cares about their family.

someone who notices the little quirks i have.

someone who surrounds themselves with true friends.

someone who can't wait to introduce me to his friends because he knows theyll love me.

someone who holds my hand when we walk into a room, hugs me without caring who's looking, kisses me on the forehead just because.

someone who looks at me and thinks im beautiful

no matter what i'm wearing, what im doing, where i am.

no matter the size of my jeans or that my stomach isn't flat.

someone who holds me, touches me, looks at me and thinks that i am just perfect,

and perfect for him.

someone who is proud to have me as his own, someone who is grateful every single day for meeting me, someone who never takes me for granted.

i want someone to look at me and see all the things i see in myself,

what my family sees, what my friends see.

i'm funny. i'm witty. sometimes i'm awkward. i'm shy, but i'm outgoing. i'm a good friend and a good person. i'm creative. i'm loving and kind. i'm smart. i surprise myself, and i will surprise you.

i believe in a small gesture meaning more than a grand display. i love to be cuddled.

im passionate. i love, and i love hard.

sometimes i over think things, sometimes i take things to heart.

i'm sensitive, and empathetic.

i care about people, their lives, their struggles.

i want to make a difference in the world.

i write messages in cards, not just sign my name.

i'm short, but just the right size for me. 

the moment i feel the most beautiful on any day is when i wake up- pink cheeks, messy hair, clear eyes.

my favorite feeling is when someone reaches for me: to hold my hand, to hug me, to sleep closer together, to cuddle.

i get a rash on my chest when i'm nervous, upset or excited.

i tear up when i feel like im being attacked, no matter how strong i'm trying to be, no matter how angry i am.

i don't like the dark.

i watch scary movies with the lights on.

i read, and i read a lot.

i have no rythym but i love to dance.

i want people to take the time to get to know me, not just decide i'm not worth it after meeting me only one time.

i don't want to know people who think i'm not worth it.

i want to be loved.

 i want to grow up. take responsibility for my life. make things happen, not just talk about it.

 i want a life im proud of, one i want to share with someone else.

i want to be happy on my own, and be happy with someone else.

i want to fall in love with my life, every single day.

Source: stayelegant.blogspot.com via Misti on Pinterest

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams

Sarah

sometimesssss i get a goood feeelinggggggg

first off, i see i have some new readers over there ------->

hii, i'm so happy you're here :)

i'm back from my weekend away: happy, exhausted, and already wishing I could go back tomorrow...

i can't even begin to describe the events of the weekend so here's a little highs/fails run down for you:

Highlights:

epic car dance parties

making new friends

going back to old stomping grounds

 butterflies from the possibility of someone new

live bands

 walking down thayer st on a beautiful warm november day

crazy dance parties

avocado quesadilla pizza

my new alex and ani bangles

waking up happy on saturday morning

 hands fitting just right

hearing "hola tesoro" from my grandma in uruguay

getting caught in the middle of illegal street racing

 best friend quality time

having some of the best conversations ever with good friends

facetiming at 230 in the morning

glittery shirts

 awesome leggings

dance parties with friends and random strangers

coming home and finding my nail swap package from my partner waiting for me

stell & stell : happy birthday lovebug!

my jj! 2nd friend at college, across the hall upstairs/downstairs neighbor, sister & fellow wawa lover

 Fails:

waking up freezing on sunday morning

my bangs not holding up in humidity

not having an iphone

ripping former awesome leggings

weird smell in spare room from the former occupant

not cute sweaty hair

being kept awake by one of missys roommates and his friends until 5:30 am and hoping to god I

wasn't that obnoxious when i was his age

i hope you all had as wonderful a weekend as i did

i must go to sleep now, my sleepy eyes are telling me so

goodnight loves

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams

Sarah

sh*t my family says aka if only we had our own sitcom

i wish all of you that haven't had the pleasure of meeting my family, really could.

you'd probably really love them, most people do.

my dad is the most interesting man in the world and cooks like he's on iron chef 24/7.

my mom is on a never ending mission to find me a husband/convince me to be a doctor-lawyer-comedian-resturanture-teacher/and an expert on how to get anywhere on the subway.

my brother is the bmoc, every single place he walks into. he's a movie star. and strategically claimed his spot at the dinner table because he can check himself out in the mirror that hangs directly across from his seat while sitting there. he won't even be the slightest bit embarassed by my telling you all that.

anyway, a lot of the time i feel like we're a running comedy routine in our house.

if we were a tv sitcom, people would definitely watch us.

my dad would absolutely get his own spin off.

let me share some of the gems that have happened around here lately:

" i always wanted to be a body builder" -dad

" really? but you never work out, why don't you go with andrew?" -me

" i've been to the gym once in my whole life, and that was to sign you up" -dad

" you never get up early for anything important" - dad
" ill get up for my free tote, im a sucker for free stuff!"- me
" it's not free if youre spending my money so you can get it" - dad
" but i get tons of new underwear that say obnoxious things on the butt!! who doesn't need more underwear that say obnoxious things on them?! you never know who might see them!!!" -me
"......................................................ok sarah." -dad

Watching tool academy at 5am with andrew giving a running commentary and talking back to the people on the show

"really? That's what they're saying in front of the mirror? I'd say damn I'm handsome, why am I on this show?"

" What's up with this therapist dressed up like a stripper"

"What up jdaddy, bet your girlfriend works at g club, I'm gonna go hit her up"
"why do you watch this show?"

"sarah would you meet someone if i introduced you to them?" - mom
"well if you were introducing her, she wouldn't have a choice" -dad
"well i have a friend and we want to set you up with her son. he's perfect for you! he's a lawyer, and has a house, and is really cute, and is almost thirty i think!"- mom
"that's great mom, sure i'll meet him"- me
"really?! you will! he lives in texas though...and i think he has a girlfriend, so maybe i won't introduce you...that probably wouldn't work out"- mom

 "look how big my pants are on me, theyre sagging off! " -andrew
 "maybe it's because you're rapping your ass off" -me

"It's the only way I can get onto facebook-if they're taking a picture of food or of someone else!" -dad in response to me taking this picture of the bread pudding i made:
:

"I want to go ask the jerk squad to fix it, that's what they're called right?"-dad
 "Do you mean the geek squad dad?" -me
"Ohhh right that's what it is!" -dad

"i just wanted to know if you're going to bring someone home with you tonight, so i can distract mom when you get here" - dad
"no dad, i will be going home alone, but thanks for the faith in me" -me
" well, just try a little harder then" -dad

My mom is telling a random rambling story at dinner and andrew bbms me from the seat next to me "cool story bro"

My mom is killing 2 birds with 1 stone: finding me a job and a man:
 mom:"sarah look you should go teach in argentina! Look how handsome the men are!"
 dad: "argentina?! No the handsome men are in uruguay, look at me, its true!"

why you havent liked my fb status yet i dont know, but I'm funny" -andrew

no its not a small! i got it in the hispanic section at walmart! it says 'ese' for hombresss!"- andrew

"you look really pretty today. i mean except your hair is too dark and i don't like it. but besides that, you look pretty" -dad

my dad before he left to visit my brother in law on his return cruise aboard a navy ship:
"im going to bring you back a boyfriend! i'm going to advertise on the ship:
{pretty girl looking for her first mate!}
 this is a great idea!"  -dad

after i extended my 3 day visit at my sisters house into a week and a half,
as posted on my fb by my brother:
"why did you buy all these cake mixes? we don't need any of these"-dad
"because Sarah likes to bake"-andrew
 "Sarah doesn't live here anymore."-dad
" {walkway being built to your window.eviction notice served}"



{looking at a picture of me when i was six:}
"you used to be so pretty"- mom
"yeah, now im just ugly" -me
" yeah now youre ugly. you should wear some heels, and stop doing that scrunching thing to your hair. if you're going to keep doing that, atleast wear it straight i like it better...oh, can you do my hair for me later?" -mom
"sure mom, after such a backhanded compliment like that, why not." -me

and some that happen outside our house, but are still equally funny:

"What's it like being a ginger and knowing you don't have a soul?" -andrew
"You're just jealous"- red head girl
"Jealous? That I have amazing black hair and I'm going to heaven and have a soul and god given talent?" - andrew

"Don't laugh we're in love"- random girl
"I don't fall in love" -andrew
"But I'm in love with you is that ok?" - random girl
"That happens often" -andrew

hope you've enjoyed these gathering of random gems, brought to you by the corts.
stay tuned for more :)

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams

Sarah

you didn't think i'd abandon you, did you?

I'm going away today to celebrate the birth of this girl:

ironically, this picture was taken last year on her birthday. good choice.

soooo while i'm away i shall leave you with this post.


it's one of those i wrote back when i didn't tell anyone i knew that i had a blog so probably a total of two people read it, and probably only by accident...


so please read and enjoy :)

click here ------------------->>>>>{ READ ME }

it's a good one, i swear.

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams

Sarah

cleaning, purging, & re evaluating

nothing like cleaning up your room
for the first time in months,
 & purging out bags and bags full of stuff
to find out what you have too much of,
and what you could use more of..

Things I don't need more of:

scarves

necklaces

shoes, shoes & more shoes

flats

boots & sneaks

4 bags full of sandals, flips and wedges

heels for occasions & regular days

sunglasses

rings

bracelets

nail polish

bows

bags...and more bags

Things I do need more of:

exercise

Source: torontofitnessfiend.tumblr.com via Sarah on Pinterest

friends (because really, who couldn't use another friend?)

Source: flickr.com via Melanie on Pinterest

Source: ruemag.com via Melanie on Pinterest

water

Source: diethoroscopes.tumblr.com via Nikki on Pinterest

hair

Source: images.beautyriot.com via Sarah on Pinterest

sunshine

Source: weheartit.com via Elaine on Pinterest

love

Source: stylemepretty.com via Jasmine on Pinterest

a social life

Source: modernhepburn.tumblr.com via Katie on Pinterest

a regular sleep schedule

Source: parisapartment.wordpress.com via Elizabeth on Pinterest

pure joy

Source: imgfave.com via Mary on Pinterest

time

Source: awindowtomyworld.tumblr.com via Sarah Box on Pinterest

and maybe this is how i'll get those things:

Source: weheartit.com via Sarah on Pinterest

with a heart full of hope & a mind full of dreams

Sarah

p.s. did anyone notice some of the ideas from pinterest that i actually made happen ?!